Dandelions Not So Dandy

Mongoose,
You told us to ask you anything so here it goes. I try to keep my yard looking nice, I sow fescue late winter, mow regularly and mulch my flowers and bushes. After all the rain we've had I have a ton of dandelions. How do I get rid of those pesky dudes?!

Dear Green and Yellow Thumb,

If a man's home is his castle, Mother Nature must have heard the same by giving us all moats here lately. I'm not a horticulture, botanical or plant science expert, nor do I play one on TV.  I do however, have a yard, not a lawn, only yankees and city slickers have lawns...You have a multitude of available products to kill dandelions, but the most effective I've used is 24D. It kills all broadleaf plants, including dandelions (and your wife's petunias if you get too close.) Check the label or see if it's even legal for mere mortal non-farmers to apply. If it's not legal (I haven't checked) get a farmer with the proper certifications to apply it. Or you could just do what I do-- pay your kids one cent per plant to dig them up before they bloom and  punish them with your preferred method if you catch them blowing the seed around.